Episode 384 of Tony Overbay, LMFT's "The Virtual Couch" podcast. Tony interviews filmmaker Reed Harkness, the film Sam Now's director and co-star. From reviewer Matt Zoller Seitz, “Sam Now" is a gentle, empathetic movie that will be unbearably intense for viewers who fear abandonment. However, that might prove to be healing or enlightening if they can stick with it to the end. Constructed of home movies and family interviews spanning 24 years, director Reed Harkness' documentary tells a painful and complicated story from his own life: his stepmother Jois (pronounced "Joyce") disappeared one day in 2000 without warning or any further contact or explanation. Even though they were separated, her leaving shocked her husband Randy; their sons Sam and Jared, who were in elementary school then; and Reed, then a teenager.” https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/sam-now-movie-review-2023
Tony and Reed explore the lifelong impacts of childhood abandonment, manifesting in Sam and Reed’s adult lives. Jois’ absence, and the subsequent revelation that it was her choice, left them wrestling with emotional wounds and damaged family dynamics. Tony explores about their Jois’ behavior, considering whether her actions might be symptomatic of extreme emotional immaturity or narcissistic tendencies. Reed shares how each family member's different reactions and coping mechanisms further complicate the dynamics and negatively impact their relationships. Reed and Tony continue to come back to the topic of what we do with our discomfort as individuals and within a family system.
Reid emphasized his interest in exploring these family dynamics and the importance of addressing uncomfortable issues, a theme deeply ingrained in his films. Despite the potential divisions it might have caused, Reid highlighted filmmaking's pivotal role in bridging the gap between him and Sam. The conversation concluded with a nod towards the therapeutic potential of open dialogue and the shared goal of effecting positive change through their respective fields.
You can find out more about Sam Now and where to watch the movie here https://samnowmovie.com/about/
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